I have had this blog for a few years, but never consistently updated it. I really regret not doing so during our infertility journey and first year of our little guys life. I am going to work really hard on keeping this up-to-date. I have joined PAIL, which is a wonderful blogger community for women like me. I am doing my first monthly theme post.
I dreamed/fantasized about being a parent most of my 20s and early 30s. I would be around family/friends and tell J I will never be that kind of parent or my kid will never do that. I think everyone has an opinion about parenting before you are a parent. I hated when friends would tell me "oh just wait until you have a kid of your own" and at the time it would be a blow to the heart. I would think I am trying to be a parent! But, now that I have my little guy I totally understand the sentiment. I read tons of books while pregnant and got plenty of advice from friends. I have stuck with some of the things I said I would never do and some things I've changed my perspective. I am a Babywise mom. I really feel it was an effective technique for our family. We did adapt in some areas to what we wanted, such as rocking. But, we did the parent led feeding and swaddled. We dropped the night feeds at 8 weeks per our pediatrician recommendation. He was sleeping all night starting at 9 weeks old. I really feel Babywise and scheduling is the reason. We both work full-time and need to keep to a routine to be able to accomplish all our daily needs. G is now almost 18 mths old and we still keep to a fairly strict routine. Yes this can have its disadvantages because if we deviate slightly from his routine it is melt down city. But, by having the schedule we can plan around his needs. I know some people disagree, but this is what works for our family. We did the CIO method (Ferber method)at 13 months because we could no longer "rock till we dropped" and we felt it was time. He did great and after 1 night of crying for a total of 40 minutes he now can be laid down at bedtime/nap with no crying and goes to sleep. We feel he sleeps better and now we rock for how long WE want to and then lay him down. I have worried about every new transition on him being slower to pick up. I never thought these things would bother me before having him. But, I have now come to the realization my boy loves routine and if I let him do it on his own time. He will transition with no issues. I thought I would be a by the book parent. You know drop the bottles at 12 months cold turkey. But, I just couldn't do it and at 16 months finally dropped his morning bottle. We had zero fuss. I think the biggest thing I've learned so far is "I am his parent and I do know best for my baby!" I now take all these milestones as recommendations not the law of parenting! I think it's easy to have an opinion of something when you're not in the moment. I have a trantrum throwing toddler and now refuse to go out to eat with him. I remember friends telling me this and thinking that's stupid just make them sit in their high chair. I now know how hard it is to JUST make them sit in their high chair. I am by no means the perfect mother. But, there is no one who loves G more than we do and wants what WE feel is best for him.
Haven Conference 2018
18 minutes ago